greg_r

Time I'll be publishing a piece of creative writing for the world to see. Hopefully noboby is too offended by the quality of the writing, especially the dialogue.

Rain, it bombards puddles and runs in torrents off of John's travelling cloak, shrugging some heat into his tired shoulders releases a new cascade from his hood as he continues to trudge forwards. Walking all day in this weather would have been pretty miserable for most travellers, but not even the unseasonable storm can shake his mind from what might be at his journey's end. All day a myriad of possibilities have played through his mind, the worst one having now been silenced thanks to Patrick.

John could never thank Patrick enough for the small sheet of paper now in his pocket, but with an eye for sizes and occasionally detail, a particularly well made replacement for the Earldom standard issue chain mail should soon be ready along with a note explaining what will happen in the days to come. Distractions like measurements and gauges of steel can only occupy John's mind for so long though, before it wanders, to bitter-sweet rememberings... Mary standing in their home, the day she told him they would have a Son, Bill as a baby, and Jeff as a baby too for that matter. And then to darker times. The mid-wife explaining what had happened, the funeral, the tiny coffin for Alice going being swallowed by the same hole as had claimed Mary. The boys all in black, the fights at school, unguarded comments and then emptiness, a hole where there used to be feeling, where his Sons used to be.

John knew he would never forgive the Earldom for taking his Sons away from him, but now with the kindness of it's citizens it was now the closest he had been to being with them again. Why had he taken so long to do this? Would it really have been impossible to find them on his own? Questions that he simply doesn't know the answer to now that he thinks about it, the best answer really is that he had to get his own life in order to do that. Finding religion, properly, as well as feeling like a father figure in Blackgate were enough to do that.

The landscape around him slowly evolves as the sky darkens from overcast to night. A forest trail fades to partial woods with the occasional village, to clear land leading into a large market town. His first destination. By the light of a shop, under it's cover from the unrelenting rain, John carefully opens the page, his hands shaking with nerves. The text is exactly as he remembers it, Pathfinder Corporal Jeff Dunmow: Camulodunum barracks. Stepping back into the weather John makes his way towards the town centre and with a little luck the barracks. Walking through the empty streets John's mind races, will Jeff even recognise him after this time? What will he say? He's so absorbed in his thoughts that he almost walks right past the barracks. Taking a deep breath John hesitates before stepping through the open doorway.

Inside it is spartanly decorated, as one would expect for a military building. There a few guards clearly on duty and several sodden oilskins hanging by a fireplace where some of them must have returned from a patrol of the grounds. Lifting his hood John approaches the nearest guard “Could I speak with Pathfinder Corporal Jeff Dunmow please?” He asks, timid at first but growing in confidence as he speaks, realising that there is no turning back now, not that there was before, not to him anyway.

Sure thing, I'll send a runner.” The man replies

“Danny! You've not been out yet, get a shift on!” He calls out to a young guard who reluctantly gets up grabbing an oil skin,

“who should I say is here?” He asks John on his way to the door. Pausing John answers

“Tell him it's his father, John.” deciding that either Jeff will want to see him or not. “You want to take a seat John?” The man he spoke to before asks, pointing to a stool next to the fire that John shuffles towards on reflex, muttering a

“Thank you” as he goes.

After an ageless ten minutes two figures approach from the rain, the lanky figure of Danny, oilskin hanging off his frame and a shorter more athletic figure. As they enter the room and lift their hoods John is transfixed by the sight of his Son, over a decade has passed but the resemblance to the little boy John looked after is clear to see in his face, even if there's nothing of the child left in the soldier's body.

Getting up John announces

“Hello Jeff, it's me... John.” Jeff pauses for a moment, unsure what to make of this man who just shows up, unannounced. He recognises his father of course, but he never really expected to see him again, not after he gave both himself and Bill away all those years ago.

“Hello Dad,” He says stiffly,

“Would you like to walk with me? Maybe we can talk?” He continues slowly, trying to decide if it's what he wants or just what he thinks he should say.

“Thank you,” John replies smiling softly as he puts his hood back up to step out into the wild of the night.

They walk together for a while before John breaks the silence,

“Congratulations on making Corporal,” he's unsure of what to say after all these years. Smiling grimly under his hood Jeff replies

“Thanks, that almost makes up for all the years you left us behind, a congratulation a couple of months after I make Corporal. What the hell took you so long?” John visibly wilts under this barrage of words,

“I couldn't find you, after they took you away they put me behind bars, for three years I waited to be released, when I was you and your brother were long gone. It's only recently that I found someone who could find where you were taken for me.” Jeff pauses for a long time, his anger useless against John's logic, but without anger he's left empty.

“You could have tried.” He replies meekly.

“I know, and I'm sorry I didn't, there simply wasn't anywhere for me to start.” John tries to explain, Bill pauses for another long time before speaking

“Have you found Bill yet?” He asks, finally.

“No,” John replies

“You were closest to where I was when I found out where you both were, I can tell you where he is though?” He adds hopefully. Jeff thinks back to the last time he saw his brother almost 10 years ago, he cried at the time but there was no obligation for the orphanage to keep them together and Bill was old enough to earn a small wage,

“Where is he now?” He finally asks. John quickly replies, hoping to keep things on a easier topic for a little while at least,

“The records I have says that he's at Stortford Monstary.” To which Jeff nods a reply.

After a few moments silence John tries again

“So, How are you finding the Pathfinders?” trying to get some sort of conversation going, he knows that it's hideously insufficient, but can't think of what else to say. Jeff sighs, shaking his head and sending water flying off his hood.

“Why are you here Dad? You turn up after all these years and haven't said anything. Why now?” His voice is controlled, but there is still a hint of sadness there, mingled with accusation to John's ears.

“I, I want to be a part of your life again Son, I know I've done you wrong and I should have never let them take you and Bill away. But I miss you both, I know that I've not been there in the past and I want try and make up for that if I can.” John tries to explain, being as honest as he can with the Son he's not seen for more than half of the boy's life.

“I'd understand if you didn't want that, but, well I thought it was worth a try.” Jeff takes it all in before replying

“I don't know what to say Dad, I've missed you and Mum, but I have a life now, that I made.” He stops walking and turns to face John

“I don't need you any more, for all the years I did need you, you weren't there. And now it's too late. I mean what did you expect? That we'd be a happy family again?” He says, exasperated. John looks crestfallen,

“I understand, I've let you down, and I really am sorry for that. But finding you, trying to be there for you again now, that's all I can do.” He explains, trying to be reasonable. Jeff replies quickly “What would you do now then?” anger rising into his voice again, John slowly replies, trying to defuse the situation

“I don't know Son, what could I do to help you? I don't expect us to be a happy family again, not for a long time, but I was hoping that we could be a part of each others lives again.” he explains hopefully.

“I don't know Dad, I don't know what to say to you,” He says, sounding tired

“I dreamed about you finding me for year, and one day those dreams died. I need time to think about this.” He explains,

“Of course,” John replies

“I've got an address, so if you want to get in touch with me you can.” He says rummaging around in his coat for a neatly written up piece of paper that Jeff takes. John smiles

“Thank you for agreeing to see me.” He says,

“You're welcome. If you find Bill tell him where I am” Jeff calls out as John slowly turns and walks back out into the night

“And thank you for coming.” Jeff whispers, entirely inaudibly as he watches the figure of his father fade into the rain.

After several more days walking the rain has cleared and the more usual summer sun beats down. John laboriously makes his way up into the hills above Stortford town, once again easily ignoring the weather, toward the monastery. Reaching the top he finds himself facing a large, but simple looking, building with a large forest stretching away behind it. Faced with a heavy looking wooden door John knocks slowly and waits. A diminutive elderly man in a monks habit comes to the door,

“Good afternoon traveller, please, come inside.” He says slowly, his voice sounding as old as he looks as he uses a pulley system beside the door to open it wide into a spacious but simple entrance room.

“Thank you. My name is John Dunmow, you are...” John says leaving room for a name from the monk. “Brother Douglas” he replies slowly,

“please, take a seat.” He says motioning to a bench to one side.

“Thank you Brother,” John says sitting down and waiting for a good opportunity to explain why he's there. Brother Douglas shuffles over to his seat asking

“Can I get you something to drink, after you walk up?” To which John shakes his head answering “No thank you, I have plenty to drink with me, I came here to ask about a young man in your service actually.” wanting to cut to the chase quickly after coming all this way. Brother Douglas looks slightly taken aback, but continues anyway,

“hmm? Of course, can I take a name please?” He asks.

“Thank you. The name is Bill Dunmow, I think he works here as a scribe?” John explains, at the mention of the name Brother Douglas seems to think for a moment before recognition crosses his face.

“That's right, although I'm afraid he left a few years back, he'd been with us for a while, over five years if memory serves.” He explains in his slightly ponderous way.

“Do you have any idea where he went?” John asks, concerned, but trying not to let it show.

“Oh yes, he went into the Barony. He'd become more and more friendly with the druids in the area, going so far as to change his name,” Brother Douglas explains,

“Their leader, Remulos, convinced our Abbot, Murphy, that Bill would do better out in the wide world, which our Abbot agreed with. If you give me a moment I'll find where Remulos said he had settled down.” He continues getting up.

“Thank you Brother, Can I help you at all?” John asks kindly.

“No thank you, I know exactly where it is, I'll be back shortly” He explains, leaving John sitting to wait while he looks. To fill the time John takes a waterskin from his rucksack and takes a drink. The hike had left his thirsty but he didn't want to inconvenience the old monk earlier, or delay him further.

After about a quarter of an hour Brother Douglas shuffles back into view clutching a piece of paper,

“Here we are,” he announces, sitting down besides John he takes out a small pair of spectacles and begins to read.

“Druid Wildmane, Kirkbright Grove, Kirkbright Estate, South West Barony Van Heusen.” Folding the spectacles and putting them away he asks

“Why did you want to find him anyway?”

“Well,” John begins to explain.

“I'm his father, I'm trying to get in contact with him again. Now I'm very sorry but I must be leaving, I've some distance to travel. I'm sure you undersand”

“Oh, yes, of course you do.” Brother Douglas replies remarkably quickly, getting up. If he's confused by the boy sent to them from the orphanage having a father in from of him he doesn;t elt it show. While he does this John hoists his rucksack onto his back and begins to leave. Pushing open the large wooden door he calls back over his shoulder.

“Thank you again for your time Brother, it really means a lot to me.” As he leaves he can hear the monk replying,

“You're welcome. Good luck John.”

Not long after John steps out of a FRAN point shaking his head. Fast Response Air Network (FRAN) travel certainly is faster than riding if you want to get somewhere, but it always leaves you feeling slightly disorientated and your ears popping. Now in the Barony Van Heusen John shrugs his shoulders to re-settle the contents of his rucksack before making off in the direction of the Kirkbright estate. It promises to be a minimum of two days hard walking and seems to have been placed as far away from anywhere else possible, apparently the Kirkbright's like their privacy.

The walking gives John a chance to think about what happened with Jeff though, it was hardly the reception that he had hoped for after all this time, but equally it was far more than he deserved. He'd had to grow up without a family because of the mistakes that John made, and now He's succeeded at that John wants to show up and be there again? John shakes his head, of course he'd considered simply sending messages to both boys once he found where they were staying, but he couldn't do it, having come so close to seeing them he couldn't just leave a message and hope. Besides if there had been no reply how would he know whether they were no longer there or simply didn't want to talk to him? He'd expected there to be problems, that nothing could simply undo the years that had fallen between them, and Jeff had taken his address. That counted for something, right? Now he supposed that he would just have to wait and see if Jeff ever wanted to contact him, it must have been one heck of a shock seeing his father after all these years. He would have been even more confused about it all than John was, at least John had the chance to think about what he was doing rather than simply appearing. Was it fair to do what he was doing? John figured that it was better than the alternative, of doing nothing about it.

The evening passed uneventfully and John rested in a small inn at a village he was passing through over night, sleeping soundly through the night, exhausted after his many days of travelling. Today his thought strayed to Bill, which was hardly surprising considering that if he kept up the same pace as yesterday he would be arriving at the estate early in the evening. If anything he was more nervous today than when meeting Jeff, things had gone poorly then and he knew that Bill had become a druid. Was this a deliberate way to distance himself from his blacksmith father? And changing his name as well? Had hatred of what had happened as a child really shaped him as a man that much? And could John blame him if it had?

It was a sticky summers evening when it happened. John hadn't been coping especially well since loosing Mary. Both Bill and Jeff had been in trouble at school and John simply hadn't been able to give them the time they needed when working so hard in the forge to make ends meet. Headman Stebbing's son, Tristram, had been around asking for a suit of armour to be made for him, saying that his father would pay and generally acting like the spoilt brat that he was. While neither Bill or Jeff were perfect neither of them were capable of being that arrogant or smug. When Tristram returned that same evening demanding to know why John hadn't stopped doing whatever work he had been to attend to him. His birthday was “only a fortnight away afterall”, and John lost his temper. Telling the boy that pestering him while he wasn't working wouldn't make him any more likely to start sooner, and foolishly saying that Bill, although half Tristam's age, would have the common sense to know that. It was probably that comparison to such a 'common' child that rankled Tristam most, all that John knew was that less than a week later he had been taken into custody, facing the Headman's own word that he had beaten Tristram and his boys had been taken to an unknown orphanage.

Arriving at the Kirkbright estate John asks the gateman for directions to the druid grove, which he gives. It must be after 6 o'clock at this point, but it will still be light for a couple of hours. The evening is warm, but not oppressive as John makes his way through golden wheat fields towards a small wooded area. After walking for a short distance through the woodland John finds the path coming to a halt in a large clearing. Sitting in the clearing is just one man, his eyes closed, a man who John immediately recognises. Bill is slight in frame unlike Jeff, but he's still very much recognisable as his bother, as John's son.

John clears his throat to announce his presence, Bill remains unmoved for a moment, before muttering something under his breath and opening his eyes. Blinking heavily and looking again at John.

“...Dad?” He asks slowly, getting up from where he's sat.

“That's right Son, there's no need to get up though, could I join you?” John asks hopefully.

“Of course,” he answers moving over to make space for John before sitting down.

“How did you find me?” He asks once they are both sat down.

“I've been in the Barony as well recently,” John explains

“I met someone from the Earldom who helped me find where both you and Jeff had last been, The head of your group, Remulos, had told the monks where you were now.”

“We call ourselves an order” Bill explains as way of answer, nodding.

“Remulos is a very knowledgeable man, did you meet him? He took care of me far more than I could have expected while I was at the monastery.”

John shakes his head, relieved by Bill's calmness, but slightly unnerved as well.

“No, I didn't. I wish I had now, but I was in a hurry to get to you.” He replies

“I understand” Bill replies, pausing briefly before asking,

“What brought you to the Barony in the first place?”

“I've been patrolling, I moved to the border after being let out of prison from when you were young and got involved in Barony patrols during the Blackgate incident.” John explains before asking

“How did you come to be here?”

Bill smiles before replying

“I've been part of the Barony patrol network as well, Remulos and the monks arranged for me to work with Tremaine's Rangers, we were the group that dealt with the flying city incident a few years ago.” he explains

“I think I remember hearing about that, with the half-ogre magi?” John asks

“Yes, that's right” Bill says, pausing before asking

“Why did you come here Dad? I mean, I tried to get back in touch with Jeff, but he clearly wasn't in the orphanage any more. Am I a bad brother?” he turns away as he says the last part, not wanting his father to see him.

“Of course not Bill,” John replies immediately, somewhat taken aback. Bill clearly freezes at the use of his real name, something he's not heard in almost 3 years.

“You can't control where you were both sent, and you took much less time in trying to find him than I did.” He explains, putting a hand on his Son's back.

“Thank you Dad,” Bill says putting a hand on his father's arm.

“It means a lot to hear that from you, to hear anything from you even.”

“I know Son, and I'm sorry it's taken so long to hear this. I know that I've failed you both, but I want to try and do something about that.” John explains.

“It's ok Dad, I forgive you, I know it must have been hard for you.”

“Thank you.” John says tears of happiness welling in his eyes.

“Tell me about this Druidism then?” He asks blinking rapidly

“It's just want fits me best in all honesty, while at the monastery I spent more and more time exploring the woods, eventually I found Remulos and what he was teaching just fit with me, it didn't feel like I had to force it to work like the teachings at the monastery, it just made sense. Have you found religion over the years?” Bill asks in return.

“That makes sense, I suppose that it's the same for me, I'm not part of an organised church or anything, but I follow the path of Order. I'm not a priest or a particularly devout follower, but it's what makes most sense to me.” John replies, the conversation continues amicably well into the night, talking about their past, how life had been treating them both and members of the patrol network who they had both met. John stays there for the night, sleeping in the small huts set just aside from the grove itself. Breakfasting with his son he leaves again much happier than before and having left contact details, both for him and Jeff, so that they can communicate easily from now on.

Arriving back at his forge in the capital briefly to set some business straight John finds a letter. It's written in a handwriting that he doesn't recognise, so he opens it.

“Dad,

Thank you for coming out to see me, I know it must have been hard for you, and that I didn't make it easier. This is hard for me too though, I've learned to live on my own, the Pathfinders are my family. I don't want it to stay that way though, it was good seeing you and it's made me really think about what I want from life. I have a formal ceremony in Camulodunum on Thursday the 28^th and I would like it if you could be there.

I received a letter from Jeff today too, thank you for putting me back in touch with him. It means a lot to us both.

I look forward to seeing you again soon,

Jeff. ”

With a smile on his face John put some tools into his bag and gets ready to go back to being Smithy, for a while at least.